How do I create a ‘secure attachment’ with my baby?

  • Hold and cuddle your baby. Simple as that! Touch is reassuring to your baby and provides a feeling of safety. Skin to skin helps both parents and baby feel calm and relaxed. Sniff in all that new baby goodness! 
  • Make eye contact. Gaze into your baby’s eyes when feeding, playing, and changing nappies; share facial expressions of joy, surprise and excitement. 
  • Watch and listen to your baby. Try to notice their early cues such as back arching, hand sucking, and grunting so you can quickly meet their needs and avoid excessive crying. This takes time and patience but your instincts will kick in. 
  • Comfort your baby every time they cry. When your baby cries, it is a signal that they needs you for food, comfort, or reassurance. Not a grizzle…I’m talking about knowing the difference in cries, which you do māmā. 
  • Speak in a warm, soothing tone of voice. Connect with your baby by smiling, singing, storytelling, or talking in a sweet, comforting voice. As long as the tone is right…you can tell them anything! Lil mates pick up on our hype and stress. That term ‘fake it til you make it’ applies here! 
  • Maintain realistic expectations of your baby. Your baby cannot soothe themselves or verbally tell you his needs until they are older than one year. Until then, they will completely rely on you to help them. Even after that, verbal cues and words are often just imitations of what they have seen or heard and you’ll need to continue to look for other cues too. 
  • Practice being fully present. Give your baby your full attention periodically throughout the day. This will mean being free of distractions such as cell phones and anything else (screens and jobs) 
  • Practice being self-aware. Notice when you are tired, anxious, angry, or frustrated, and take care of yourself. You are better able to meet your baby’s needs when you are aware of your own and can act on them. 

Article provided by Sarah of 
Routachment. Postnatal Education & Coaching professional.

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published